Today it has been 3 years since my dad died.
I miss him so, so much and wish he was still here in so many ways.
The last time I saw my dad was Friday 1st October 2010. I had gone to his house to grab a pair of shoes I had left and needed for a night out. As usual I got the drive carefully from him and I was in a bad mood so didn't really say much back. I wish I had said more or maybe just a little nicer on that last day.
They are not sure when he died as last time he was heard from was the Friday but he was not found until the Saturday. He died from suicide as my dad was very ill with depression. I have spoken about my own feelings about this many times and I am not angry but I do miss him.
I miss the fact he was so proud of me and my sister. She is pregnant at the minute and he would be so happy to be a grandpa. I miss the fact he cannot see what I am doing now and be there to tell me I am doing a good job as I don't hear it from mum.
I bought some sunflowers and I am not going to put them by a grave but enjoy them being in my house and seeing them.
So this may be short and sweet but it is just a small message to my dad to say thank you for all you did and miss you so much.
